languatron
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Life could be this beautiful without NBC-TV in it.
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BECAUSE THE APOGEE OF BONNIE HAMMER'S STUPIDITY IS RECOGNIZED IN THIS MONUMENTAL DISASTER...
Five years ago, Sci-Fi Channel aired two episodes of a PUKE SATURATED television series which proved to be the "Powder Keg Catalyst" for undoing any favorable reputation Bonnie Hammer might have had before this disaster aired. The "Battlestar Galactica" segment of "Sciography" (which was the first episode of "Sciography's two episode run) was a milestone on four fronts:
1) It proved that Universal Studios/Sci-Fi Channel (either through naivete or arrogance) hasn't got
a God damn clue as to what the true history and genesis of "Battlestar Galactica" really is. (Leslie Stevens
contributions weren't even mentioned, nor were the production problems mentioned caused by ABC-TV
greenlighting a regular series midway through the shooting of the pilot.)
2) "Sciography" was a frightening prelude as to what Universal/Sci-Fi Channel had up their sleeves for the future
of the "Galactica" brand name, which eventually turned out to be Ronald D. Moore's crappy ass television series.
(As terrible and poorly produced as "Sciography" was, this was nothing compared to the HORSESHIT that was
just around the corner from Ronald D. Moore.)
3) The tone of "Sciography" indicated that Universal/Sci-Fi Channel regarded "Battlestar Galactica" as nothing more
than "National Enquirer" level TABLOID TRASH.
4) If ever there was proof that the Universal/Sci-Fi Channel corporation had a PERSONAL VENDETTA against the
"REAL 1978 GALACTICA SERIES", it was EVER PRESENT in "Sciography."
From the POOR RESEARCH that went into "Sciography", to the PORNO BACKGROUND MUSIC, to the narrator who sounded like he was hung over from the night before, "Sciography" proved beyond a shadow of a doubt that it was made by a network president who had a solid background in the WORLD WRESTLING FEDERATION and CHILDREN'S PROGRAMMING. Bonnie Hammer, (like all of the other programs she plans for her network), took as much care in the production of "Sciography" as she did planning a Saturday afternoon wrestling match for the WWF. In short, "Sciography" was an UNPRECEDENTED DISASTER. A televised NUCLEAR HOLOCAUST which is not unexpected given Bonnie Hammer's professional (  ) background prior to managing Sci-Fi Channel.
"Sciography" started off with a clip of the 1978 "Emmy Awards", which our INEBRIATED NARRATOR informed us was not watched by anyone because they were watching the premiere of "Battlestar Galactica." In hindsight, I wish Sci-Fi Channel had just shown the 1978 "Emmy" broadcast in its entirety, given the HORSESHIT viewing experience "Sciography" turned out to be. We then moved onto Glen Larson chatting about (HIS VERSION) of the origins of "Galactica." Isn't it amazing how Glen A. Larson is all over the God damn place whenever someone grants him camera time? A luxury Glen A. Larson CAN'T EVEN grant himself. Larson was also seen on an "A&E Biography" of Jane Seymour, and a David Hasselhoff biography. We all know the "Glen A. Larson PLATITUDES" by now regarding "Galactica", don't we?......"1966....Vietnam.....Star Trek.....Adam's Ark....Four Preps....Beach Boys.....portable typewriter...etc....etc.....ECCHH!!! Isn't it amazing how Leslie Stevens and his link to the summer of 1977 NEVER gets uttered by Glen A. Larson? I'll leave it at that.
After Larson SPEWED forth his usual "GEORGE W. BUSH-esque CLAPTRAP" regarding "Galactica", "Sciography" actually got a quarter of the way entertaining. We heard from John Dykstra.....BUT NOT ENOUGH, we heard from Richard Hatch & Dirk Benedict...BUT NOT ENOUGH, we saw footage of the "Galactica" cast on the "Dinah!!" show....BUT NOT ENOUGH, we saw theatrical trailers from the Canadian release of "Galactica"....BUT NOT ENOUGH. Everything you wished "Sciography" could be while watching this TOILET SHIT never materialized. As a viewer, you wanted "Sciography" to at least treat the subject matter with respect; but since we're dealing with the Universal/Sci-Fi Channel corporation, that's like expecting Dick Cheney to step forward and state that he has been the real President of the United States since 2000. It will never happen.
"Sciography" winded down to a DISASTROUS HALT at its conclusion by offering us a roll call of the "Galactica" cast members, which really wasn't a roll call at all because viewers were offered a current whereabouts of "Evie the Chimp" (who cares?); while NEGLECTING to tell us what happened to Maren Jenson, Tony Swartz, and David Greenan. "Sciography" had as much research and thought put into it as John Kenneth Muir put into his "Analytical Guide to Battlestar Galactica", WHICH ISN'T SAYING MUCH. So to compensate, we had MINDLESS DRIVEL from Muir himself, and "Galactica" #1 fan Scott Mantz-WHOEVER THE HELL HE IS. "Sciography", like Muir, gathered all of their EASILY ACCESSIBLE INFORMATION from such EASILY ACCESSIBLE SOURCES as old "Starlog" magazines, "Fantastic Films" magazines, and ABC-TV press releases WELL KNOWN at the time. (Whether or not this information was TRUTHFUL or not was IRRLELEVANT to the Universal/Sci-Fi Channel corporation. They had TAMPONS to sell on their 30 second commercial spots and DAMNIT, nothing was going to get in their way!!) "Sciography" didn't do any digging, which is the mark of responsible journalists and broadcasters (once again, we're talking about the Universal/Sci-Fi Channel corporation here.)
Let me say this to Bonnie Hammer and the rest of the NBC-Universal employees who try to pass themselves off as professional broadcasters....."Sciography" was your HIROSHIMA.............
DON'T LET IT BE FORGOTTEN!! 
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